With its low self-esteem and high urban blight, Hartford is the ultimate underdog city. Sad City Hartford documents the joys, sorrows and eccentricities of New England's Rising Star.

Tuesday, December 11, 2012

Sad City's Guide To Christmas Shopping



We are within two weeks of Christmas which is followed by the most miserable time of the year, commonly referred to as January and February. With only a few shopping days (we aren't sure how shopping days are calculated, nor do we care) left before Christmas, there's always Amazon.com but some insist on personally venturing into the commercial sector. That's cool, that's what we are here for.

We aren't going to get all super boring and tell you to get some gift cards to a local restaurant,  you aren't amoeba, you already know that. Nor are we going to lecture you on buying only "local only, organic only, no animals, no Republicans, no sugar, all natural" you aren't schoolchildren. What we do have is some fine Hartford area selections. Think of anything we missed? Leave it in the comments.

Without further ado, we bring you the Sad City Christmas Guide, the latest installment in the Sad City Guide series.




One (of the many) bad thing about summer ending is no more Hooker Watermelon. Hooker offsets the loss of the Watermelon Ale with their stellar Nor'Easter brew, which everyone should sample. The Hooker store offers a variety of Hooker items, many with amusing one-liners playing off the Hooker name.


It's not a journey, it's an experience and the Hartford Denim Co. makes the coolest and most durable jeans you are going to find. Stop by the store, select a pair and they are guaranteed for life. The boys recently inked a deal with Timberland, so look for them to get bigger and better. Get in now before Brad Pitt is hocking their jeans on tv!


J. Rene not only brews up a serious cup of jo, they sell their top notch coffee by the pound and sell a wide variety of fancy coffee makers. Some of the coffee makers can only be described as "coffee bongs." We have no idea how they work and we are pretty sure we'd knock them over and break them in our apartment, but they are guaranteed to impress your coffee snob friends. 


Ok, it might not be listed on the link, but we heard for $120 donation to Connecticut Public Radio you can get your voicemail message recorded by Chion Wolf of The Colin McEnroe Show. That's pretty sweet. Seriously who would you rather have on your voicemail? James Earl Jones? Morgan Freeman? Axl Rose circa 1987? Maybe, but ya ain't getting them. Bonus good cheer for a good cause. 


RETRO JERSEYS AT THE SALVATION ARMY

Let's see. Retro? Check. Affordable? Check. Charity? Check. Ironic? Check. Folks, this is what's known as a win-win-win-win. Bring the memories of summers past on Christmas with a jersey shirt from your heros of yesteryear. R.A. Dickey models likely available soon. 

GOLD CLUB CASH

The Gold Club is a popular Hartford adult entertainment destination. In this picture we see from the patron outside that even jawas like to frequent the establishment. Finish your shopping list by getting some Gold Club cash for the nightlife loving individual on your list. Local business? Yup. Helping artists? Yup, dancing counts. Support education? Of course, you know they are all working their way through grad school.




2 comments:

  1. We donated to wnpr last week so that Chion would do Freed McKeen's voicemail. We should have though of offering Christmas gift certificates for wills and tried to make your list. Oh, wait. The recipient might hate that.

    ReplyDelete
  2. This is a great article and I love finding sites like this about Christmas. Since the holiday season is soon approaching people need to make sure they have enough money to get presents. Obviously, there some people who might be strapped for cash but there are many ways to receive a lump sum cash.

    ReplyDelete