Monday, August 1, 2011
Changing Hartford One Good Deed At A Time
The Half Door is one of the best places in Hartford. It did have the drawback of having what was officially known as Hartford's Most Awkward Bathroom. Not anymore. In what we suspect was a reaction to the diligence and crack reporting by Sad City, we can confirm that the men's room at the Half Door now has dividers.
Most industry analysts are calling this a brilliant move. One analyst who specializes in tracking trends in Hartford bathrooms says that they expect this move to "reduce bathroom awkwardness by 97%" while increasing the Half Door's bottom line as male patrons will be encouraged to indulge in an extra pint or two. "Our research shows that people go to the Half Door to drink beer and eat food, and this move will embolden customers to do more of the former."
The analyst also noted that "the Half Door did their research and from surveying their customers found out that 100% of the customers had intended to come to the Half Door." Research also showed that 98% of the Half Door patrons had arrived at the Half Door via either the street or sidewalk. It was unclear how the other 2% arrived.
One customer who had traveled from the exotic suburb of Glastonbury stated "I always thought there was nothing to do at the Half Door, but thanks to the media campaign on Sad City we learned there was music, drinks and food, my husband and I had always been under the impression that everyone in Hartford just sat around and stared at each other."
It was also noted that no outside consulting firms were brought in to weigh in on the decision to add the dividers. The move appears solely prompted by Sad City's desire to improve Hartford one good deed at a time. Sad City salutes the Half Door on this decision and looks forward to many more pints, scotch eggs and rounds of Golden Tee at the Half Door.
A decision on a new bathroom to take the now vacated title has not yet been announced.